Sorry Trumpkins, our president has no secret recording of Comey. Last week, Trump’s firing of James Comey unleashed a shit storm that has been pulverizing the White House ever since. Essentially, Trump fired the head of the department investigating him on treasonous charges.

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Harvard law professor Alan Dershowitz said, “This is the most serious charge ever made against a sitting president.” Fox article

Sorry Trumpkins, it is getting very difficult to defend him.

The press had a field day with Trump’s apparent injustice. Articles from around the world were being written about James Comey being fired. The world was appalled at the thought that the leader of America, the bastion of liberty and democracy, would commit such a callous crime. Things looked bad for Trump.

As we all know, when Trump is vanquished, he knows the only thing to do is to appear resilient.

Suddenly this weird tweet sprouted up.

According to the ill worded tweet, he has some dirt on Comey. If you are a Trump supporter, this tweet made you smile and do a fist pump. Despite the avalanche of criticism at the time, Trump’s tweet gave his supporters something to squish around in their hands. Trump’s tweet was but a ray of light in a sea of darkness.

But since then, the likelihood of this recording actually existing has diminished greatly. Comey wishes the tapes exist, because then his story will be validated. He recorded his version of the dinner.

If Trump is telling the truth there are a few stipulations that also must be true. For starters, any recordings of conversations must be turned over to Congress. That is law. Another law states it is illegal to destroy the tapes. The Atlantic

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Ever since Trump’s tweet, White House Press Secretary Sean Spicer has been asked several times about them at the daily briefings. His rehearsed reply is always the same. “The president has nothing further to add on that.”

You’d think that if Trump really had this secret recorded conversation, that proved he was right and Comey was wrong, he wouldn’t hesitate before broadcasting it to the world. Our president may be a lot of things. Restraint is not one.

Shouldn’t shock anyone that Tweedle-Dee isn’t hip on White House surveillance laws. In fact, every day he demonstrates to the world exactly how little he knows about the White House, government, politics, and history. He knows so little that when this recording idea popped into his orange head, he didn’t stop to think about the consequences, and just sent out that stupid tweet. As a result, he will have to present the recording, or admit they don’t exist.

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What was he thinking?

Let’s try to get into Donald’s gigantic cranium. Buckle up, this is gonna be a long and strange trip! This’ll be a little disorganized though. I apologize, but I’m just trying to figure out Donald’s twisted logic.

What is the president thinking to tweet out such an empty threat? Assuming he didn’t know about White House surveillance laws, he must have figured sending out that tweet would be a win-win for him.

Everything else he has done has magically worked out for him. After all, his first nominated position is the president of the United States. He earned this prestigious title while being sued for sexual harassment (from many women) and scamming children and senior citizens out of an education. Donald Trump must think that he has the Midas touch. He must think that everything his fat orange fingertips touch turn to gold.

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“James Comey better hope that there are no ‘tapes’ of our conversation before he starts leaking to the press.”

This sentence is about as definitive as when Lester Holt asked him to clarify that James Comey asked for the dinner between the two.

“Dinner was arranged. I think he asked for the dinner.”

Both sentences maintain an ambiguous certainty. That is not a coincidence.

Neither sentence is a lie. Then again, neither sentence is true.

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By tossing out that statement about his alleged recorded conversation with Comey, Trump is turning the situation on it’s head. Comey was investigating Trump for conspiring with the Russians to steal the election. According to Donald Trump the two had dinner together. During which, according to Donald Trump, he asked Comey for his loyalty. Then, Trump fired Comey.

Things looked really bad for Donald. But by sending out such a tweet, his loyal supporters must think,

‘Gee whiz. If the president is threatening to release the conversation, Comey must have said something that would make him not want Trump to release it.’

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Suddenly Comey is on the defense. Though, what could Comey have said that would be so damaging? The thought that James Comey and Donald Trump have dinner together and COMEY is the one to say something scandalous that is threatened to be released, is preposterous.

Republicans are starting to join the democrats’ call for Trump to release this tape. The day will come when Trump will have to admit he was just talking out of his ass.